00:00 : Networking, It can have such a negative connotation and today I want to teach you how to network effectively and hopefully reframe it so that it doesn’t feel gross to you or scary to you. This is definitely something that I’ve had to learn to do over the years and ironically, I learned it in network marketing. How did that work, effectively? And it has been key to so many areas of my life as well as building this business, I am the author of the Little Shop Picture Book series, and I’ve taken that book series and turned it into a curriculum known as a Little Shop Publishers workshop, as well as turning it into a public speaking career and Creating a Diverse Business. Networking has been key to so many areas of my life. 

00:54 : however, I must preface this with I want you to understand, I struggled with networking in the beginning. I had 

01:05 : social anxiety. I Was in my network marketing business. And the product that I was sharing with people with something I really believed and I still believe everybody should consume. We all need nutrients it transformed my life, and I wanted to shout it from the mountaintops and make sure everybody knew about this amazing product. So it forced me out of my comfort zone. So if whatever product you are, Promoting or business that you have. If you feel passionately about it, I know you can do this. 

01:43 : And I’m grateful for that because I’m grateful that I was so passionate about it, because it really did force me out of my comfort zone and I would practice networking with people. I didn’t even know. Total cold market. Like random people at the grocery store. And I would practice making a connection with them. And it made me so uncomfortable. My face would blush. I would be so red, My voice was shaky. My hands were sweaty. 

02:15 : if you saw me today, you would probably find it hard to believe that that’s where I started and honestly people who’ve known me my whole life would be really surprised because when I know somebody it’s very easy for me to say hi and make a connection and visit Even though I don’t like small talk. I can’t stand small, talk Exhausting if I had a total stranger like, open up about their lives, and their goals, and their dreams and their fears. I’d be like I’m all in but a brand new small talk, it’s very painful to me. So I’ve had to learn how to embrace that as well. 

02:51 : And as I practiced, Connecting with people. That’s really what networking is is making a connection. Then I got more and more comfortable and I was it was so much easier over time. So, practice, it allow yourself to be clunky with it. And allow yourself to be awkward. And if it’s a stranger who cares? You’re never gonna see them again. So that might be a good way to start. I also think it’s important to have like 

03:25 : One of the things that you can consider is the term form F, o R m, You may have heard this before, it’s family, occupation, recreation, and motivation. If you ask questions in those categories, It helps you get started with conversation. So this is if you’re just practicing with random people And I do think it’s important to practice with random people because everybody has this invisible sign on their head. That says, See me, hear me. I want to feel like I am important. 

04:01 : and one of the things I love to do, you know, just because is 

04:06 : Complimenting a stranger. See the see if the like their shoes. Maybe you like their shoes or something and you can say, Oh I love those shoes and smile. Smile at them. Give them a compliment. Practice connecting with people and uplifting them, encouraging them. Maybe you see a mom who you want to say like you’re such a great mom. And smile and you can just walk away. Like it doesn’t have to be this big thing. 

04:42 : It’s practicing making a connection with people and uplifting and encouraging them. That is the foundation of building a true relationship with people is seeing the good in them and vocalizing that you see it. So doing this. I love it because you know, you never know what people are going through and The times that I’ve gotten a random compliment from a stranger, it’s like that was so kind or maybe it was what I needed at the most, and they have no clue. 

05:15 : So doing this is such a great thing because it’s a win-win. It’s Because I do think it’s important that we’re kind to people and this is such a simple way to be kind. 

05:31 : so, when it comes to business, though, You may go to networking events and there is a strategy to that. And I know that that sounds gross, right? We’re talking about building real connections and relationships and then we’re going to talk about strategy with it. That seems like it doesn’t go together. I want you to consider your energy and you need to be strategic with your energy 

05:56 : all the time. So, for me, when I go to a big event and I’m networking with people and it’s business, I can leave feeling very tired. And my strategy in protecting my energy, is I look around the room and I think, who would I want to be friends with? Pretty much the people that I do business with consistently have become very dear friends. Some of them have become family to me, and that is how I choose to do business. You may not choose to do business that way. That’s the only way I know how to do it because I truly love the people that I work with or I wouldn’t work with them. 

06:36 : So, that is one of the first things I do is I scan the room and I just kind of stand back and I watch people. I see, how are they treating people? How are they? Treating the people working the event, not just the people that are important at the event. 

06:52 : If they’re up just chit-chatting with the people who are in charge of the event and brown-nosing, I’m really not gonna probably hang out with them. They have a different. You know. Relationship style than I do. They have a different networking style than I do. Now, if they’re genuinely friends, that’s different, right? You can tell the difference. but if they are kind to the servers at the event, or Just Gen in general. Seem like a kind person and they look like they’re confident if I am networking for my business. I do look for confidence. It doesn’t have to be something where they are. You know. 

07:45 : Kicking. It doesn’t have to be something where they look like they have their act completely together. You can be confident and look somewhat of a mess and still be valuable and still be somebody that I would network with. But I, I am wanting to network with people who I think we can help each other’s businesses grow. Now, when it comes to mentorship, they don’t have to have confidence if I’m going to be mentoring them. 

08:14 : Okay, so If you’re not completely confident, it’s okay. People will still network with you. All right. I do want to make sure that these people are kind and somebody that I would want to be friends with because I believe that networking when it’s done, best is building genuine relationships. It needs to be a win-win where I am adding value to them and they are adding value to me. 

08:46 : I don’t want it to feel like it’s this transactional can connection. Yes, there is business strategy with transactional connections. It’s not my favorite. It was something that happened from time to time in network marketing. I didn’t like it, especially when I thought it was a genuine connection and the other person it was strictly transactional, the feels really gross. So if you are that kind of person, please don’t network with me. Person. 

09:15 : so, Yes, you wanted to be a win-win and a given take and that type of thing that should be all relationships in your life. Not that you’re keeping track of, you know, keeping score but I am there to add value to them as well. I don’t want to just take Part of building genuine relationships with people is be curious about them. Remember the form. Family Occupation Recreation Motivation, You can ask some questions based on that, even at a networking event you can ask them, You know. So what is your business? How did you get started? And genuinely be curious about them and their business and their goals and what they’re wanting to do. 

10:05 : Of course, make sure you get a business card or their phone number. Something like that. Get out your phone. What’s your phone number? I would love to get together for a walk or coffee or lunch, whatever. It is a zoom, doesn’t matter. I would like to reconnect after this event. Okay. But you need to be curious about the people around you. It’s so fun so far. I really haven’t met a boring person. 

10:33 : The strangers, I’ve met the friends, I have everybody has such interesting stories about their lives and where they’ve been where they’re going, where they’re at right now, but be curious about the people around you. And find what makes them special and unique and interesting and encourage them. That’s part of building genuine relationships with people. If it’s just transactional you’re going to only ask business and say Okay well I can do this for your business. Can you do this for my business? That’s strictly transactional. And listen, there’s a time and a place for that. I guess I just don’t make space for that in my networking. This. 

11:22 : Second step is so important and it’s maintaining relationships with effective 

11:30 : follow-up. So you’ve gotten this business card, you’ve gotten their phone number. What I have learned every event. So far, I am the one who contacts them with the follow-up. I’m the one that takes action. Be the person who takes action get out your phone and send a text like, Hey, it was so great meeting you. I loved hearing about your business or I love hearing about XYZ, and I’m the one who So then they remember you don’t assume that they remember you. And then coordinate, a time to meet up. You take it upon yourself, do not wait for them to schedule with you. Do not wait for them. 

12:20 : You take action and take full responsibility for your business and for the opportunities that come your way. so, You want to schedule that follow up? And then network marketing, there’s something called, BAM, fam. It’s book a meeting from a meeting. So after your first meeting, you might realize Just kidding. I don’t think this is a good fit. I don’t feel comfortable with this person. Listen to that little voice. You don’t have to do Bam, Bam book, a meeting from a meeting. 

12:50 : But you can, if you’re like, man, this is a super cool person. I want to continue to hang out with them learn together, grow together, whatever it may be. Or maybe there’s gonna be another event. That one of you knows about that, you can tell the other and you can meet up at that event. Whatever it may be, get out your phone at the end of your time together and book a meeting from a meeting. When do you want to get together again? It might be three months down the road. It might be six months down the road. It does not have to be a regular. Meeting time. 

13:27 : But you want to get it on your calendar. And one of the things I tell people is I know that our lives are very full and chaotic. I would like to get it on the calendar. We can reconnect a few weeks in advance and see if it still works. If we have to reschedule, we have to reschedule because listen, we’re going out there making things happen and have very full lives so we can always reschedule And then put it in your task list on your calendar. A few weeks before to touch base. 

13:56 : Touch base with that person and make sure that that meeting date. Time location still works. In the meantime. Find ways to Add Value to them. If you read an article, this is something that I have to improve on. I’m not great at this partly, because I’m spinning my wheels so much right now. Creating things for my own business, that I don’t really have the capacity to see outside of that right now, and that’s okay, too. So you might be in that position. This is a tip for down the road. 

14:28 : Find articles or find things that connect with them, it could even be on LinkedIn or on other social media platforms. Whatever it may be, that makes you think of that person and could add value to them, share it with them, find ways to add value to them as people. In their business. That’s really important. So be a good friend. Think about this isn’t just about business. If at the end of the day it’s only about business. I don’t want to do it. 

14:59 : Because I care about people too much and I know at the end of our lives. Yes, building a strong business can be life-changing. It’s an income. It’s a way to make an impact, but at the end of my life, I’m not going to be like, Wow, I really networked in a transactional way with all those people, that felt really good. That’s not what I’m gonna say. I’m very confident when I’m 120. 

15:21 : That I’m not going to be saying that at 120 I want to look back on my life and smile and say Wow. Like I made a lot of really cool friends and met interesting people and was able to make an impact with this life that I got to have, right. So you do you but that’s my mentality. When it comes to maintaining those relationships. and then, With. Networking, It is a mindset shift. It’s a skill. And a mindset shift. So, you need to determine what networking means to you. You need to decide how you want to network. 

16:10 : You might say, Tasha. I’m totally fine with transactional connections with people and Just making it about business. Always, I don’t do business with family or friends or anything like that. I don’t think that works in my business culture to You know, really build relationships with the people working for me. Okay, that’s up to you. You’re allowed to create the business that you want. That’s not the way that I want to do business. So take what I have said and you may need to shift your mindset a little bit, but also know it is a skill that as you practice it. 16:51 : You will get more and more comfortable connecting with people and be able to do it faster and it’s actually going to become a little bit more fun. I know for me in general, on the front end, it’s exhausting because sometimes, you can think it’s a genuine person or that, it’s going to be this really cool symbiotic relationship. And then you after many, you know, meetups and over time, you’re like, wow, that I did not see that coming. 

17:25 : And it did not work out well, so that part’s kind of exhausting but I will say some of the Closest friendships I have. and people who we’ve helped each other professionally, Have come from networking events. So you can always look up like you know, Meetup has stuff. Of course Facebook. You know, they have events. Search on LinkedIn, search on your whatever search engine. You like, to, to use see if there’s local meetup things, you can also become part of like, your local chamber or local things check with your library. I think I say this on every episode The library could be a really great resource. So find out what’s in the area from them. 

18:17 : You know, if you have universities in college’s in your area that maybe have business departments find out from them, maybe there’s things in the area go to things that you think are fun. It doesn’t just all have to be business. Go to things that you think. Wow this is like a really cool class or I want to learn more about this. Go to it and go make friends. It’s kind of like going back to kindergarten go learn how to make friends. 

18:51 : so, You may not be sold on the importance of networking. But there was a LinkedIn survey and 2016 that said that 85% of jobs are fulfilled through networking and I know, I experienced that when I was waiting tables at a Family-owned and operated business a local business to my hometown. And I had a, you know, a regular customer who I loved his family and got to know them and everything and he passed along my resume. During a time period, where teachers were really not getting hired. 

19:35 : At least not brand new teachers because we were competing with teachers who had been in the field for five years or 10 years. So he passed along my resume to the person who was in charge of the Archdiocese of Indianapolis and hiring teachers, that I’m not making any promises but he passed it along. And it got me an interview. Now, the interview got me the job but it was because of forming a connection. I wasn’t forming that connection thing. Like this guy someday is gonna help me get a job. 

20:07 : Now, I Did my job as a waitress and Ended up getting a job. So keep that in mind. 85% of jobs are fulfilled through networking. That’s a LinkedIn survey Harbor Business Review the same year found that it was 70%. So Keep in mind, it’s still a vast majority of them. Your follow-up is so important, a 2018 study by LinkedIn. So the 70% of 

20:50 : professionals prefer value, added follow-up. Value added followup versus a check-in. 70% of professionals. so, add value when you’re following that, when you’re following up not just Let me redo that. In 2018 LinkedIn found that 70% of professionals prefer a value-added, follow-up versus a check-in. so, when you are doing these follow-ups, don’t just say Hey wanted to check in and see how you’re doing. They’re gonna be like, I’m great, thanks, how are you great? Okay, bye. And then that’s it, right? So if you can add value to them, Based on things that they have told you and you you may not remember everything people say. So after you’re meeting up with somebody, put some notes in their contact information in your phone, write it down somewhere, you could use trello or you know, one note a place to save information so that way you remember, some of the key things that they have told you about themselves and then you can add value and help them in their personal life or professional life 70% of professionals prefer that It is really important that you follow up within 24 hours of the event. 

22:32 : Make sure that you’re following up with them because that’s going to significantly increase the likelihood of your continued relationship. So, don’t wait a week, like Oh, you know, it’s a week later and I’m finally connecting with this person. No. Do it either at the event or the very next day. So even if at the event you schedule a time to connect later the next day you could say, Hey it was so great meeting you yesterday. I really enjoyed Connecting about or visiting about XYZ. 

23:05 : I’ll see you soon or I’ll see you on the 28th, Whatever. Okay, so following up within 24 hours, keeps you freshen each other’s mind. And shows that you’re actually looking forward to connecting with them. If you feel anxious and social settings, that’s okay. Like I said, I used to as well, and the American Psychological Association has found that 70% of people experience anxiety, and social settings, including networking. 

23:45 : so, most of the people around you are going to be anxious to So decide that you’re going to have the courage to speak up and connect with somebody. So have that courage and be willing to have humility and know that. Hey, you might, you might embarrass yourself a little bit, right? The words might not come out, right? And you can laugh and be like Oh my goodness, these types of things make me so nervous. 

24:14 : But you seem like a cool person and I wanted to come say hi right? Just point out the elephant in the room. If you flub over the words or if you are nervous people are super kind when you’re honest. You know, so Be the person who has the courage to speak up, have the accumulative to admit that you’re nervous. If, if something doesn’t land right? That’s totally fine. 

24:37 : People, the other personal most likely to say, Yeah, these things make me so nervous too, right? And then you’re connecting on an actual human level, which is what we really ultimately want, as human beings is human connection. I certainly hope that you incorporate networking into your Business schedule. It needs to be something that you’re intentional about always. And making time for it and that you also go out and make friends and find ways to uplift and encourage other people. 

25:19 : If you can do that, even if it doesn’t build your business, it’s gonna lead to a good life. And I really hope that That’s what your goal is to have a good life. Yes. We want to build our businesses. Yes. We want to build our dreams and, and all of that, that’s important. But at the end of the day, you want to live a life that you can smile and say. 

25:39 : That was a good one.