00:00 : Welcome to Diary of a Dreamer, where resilience unlocks your

potential. I’m Tasha Eizinger, and each week I’ll bring you powerful stories and

practical insights from my own experiences and inspiring guests. Whether

you’re facing challenges or chasing dreams, this podcast is your go-to for

motivation, building confidence, and practical tips for transforming obstacles

into opportunities. Be sure to check out my website, TashaEizinger.com. Let’s

dive into today’s episode and start turning your dreams into reality.

00:35 : Today we are here again with Dr. Lisa Riegel. I loved having

you the first time and I’m so grateful that you agreed to come back because

today we’re going to focus on ADHD and ADD. But first of all, I need to mention

that Dr. Riegel has written a couple of books, Aspirations to Operations and

NeuroWell. I strongly encourage everybody to check those out. And she’s a

former teacher. who also earned her phd in systems or policy sorry policy and

leadership and did this all while raising her two kids so you are also a

superhero either

01:16 : that or nuts that’s

01:18 : a fine line

01:18 : sometimes yeah

01:20 : oh my goodness backtracking you know you were a former

teacher i’m a former classroom teacher when i had students in my classroom

that i knew were somewhere in that ADD, ADHD spectrum. My first thoughts

were always, you know, because I didn’t want them to have to be on medicine.

because I would accommodate. They didn’t need all the paperwork. I willaccommodate, but I would say, you know, like what kinds of food, what are

their sleeping habits? How much exercise are they getting? All of that. So I want

to address, first of all,

01:54 : I think sometimes people think it’s so overly diagnosed, but

you and I know that there are certain people you can just tell when you’re a

teacher, right? So yes, we do need to do those things, but let’s say people are

doing those things mostly well. How do we get past that it’s overly diagnosed

stigma?

02:16 : Right. Well, I think one thing is that we are seeing some

increases in ADHD behaviors. And so I think, you know, let’s talk first about

what it is and what it isn’t. Okay.

02:32 : ADHD is the same as executive function disorder. So. When in

fact, when my daughter was diagnosed, they were like, you know, she has ADD.

And I said, she doesn’t have ADD. Like, what are you talking about? Like she

did. So they sent me home with this article on executive function disorder. And I

read the article and I called the doctor and I was like, do you live with me? Like,

this is exactly what is happening. And that was my first notice of, wow, I really

have some stigma and stereotypes about what it is and what it isn’t. So I really

started studying it a lot deeper. And essentially.

03:07 : ADHD is an executive function delay. And I think the reason

that we’re seeing so many more students that are struggling with that is

because students are not developing executive function. So can you explain what

03:19 : that is to people who don’t know what executive function is?

03:22 : Yeah, so executive function is the ability to prioritize

information, to manage time, to manage emotions, to control impulsivity. It’s

basically the thinking part of our brain, how to problem solve. And we are

seeing in our kids today, and I talk about this in NeuroWell at length, we are

seeing that there are a whole bunch of contextual factors that are impacting

our executive function development in kids. So, for example, when you and I

were kids, we had to memorize phone numbers. That practiced working

memory. Well, working memory is an executive function, and it’s also critical for

math. And so we just the way we lived, we had to memorize addresses or

phone numbers. So our brain just developed that ability. Kids today don’t have

to do that, which is great because it’s convenient, but we’re not doing anythingto fill that gap. And so one of the things I talk about with parents always is play

memory games when you’re in the car, play memory games at dinner, play,

practice that skill. You know, I’m going to grandma’s house and I’m going to

take my pencil and my pencil and my dog and my pencil, my dog, my friend, my

pencil, my dog, my friend, you know,

04:32 : because I repeat it back. So like you say a word and then you

kind of go back and forth. Is that what you’re.

04:37 : Yeah. So I would say I’m going to grandma’s house and I’m

taking my pencil. And then now

04:42 : it’s your turn. And you say, I’m going to grandma’s house. I’m

taking a pencil and my dog. Yep.

04:46 : And I’m going to grandma’s house. I’m taking my pencil, my

dog and a comb. And you just keep going back and forth and all the way

around the car, whoever’s in the car. But it encourages active listening and it

helps to build those muscles in your brain. You know, muscles with air quotes,

but it practices that. And what we have today is that kids are just on screens.

And screens are designed to, they’re designed as dopamine addiction machines,

right? They are designed for it. They are designed for quick attention seeking

reinforcements. And so it’s the opposite of what you really need to be able to

think and critically, you know, look at information and make sense of the world.

So that’s one thing. The other thing we see is that kids today don’t have

unstructured time.

05:35 : This is breaking their brains. And as a parent, I understand

the desire to keep up with the Joneses or to get your kid involved in those

things. And to be honest, it’s hard to not have your kid in things because

everybody’s so overstructured that nobody can have just unstructured play. But

when we have unstructured play, we have to be creative and we learn to find

ways to be entertained. And we learn how to manage conflict. If you and I are

playing together and I’m being a jerk and you say, I want to go home, you can

go home. And then I sit back and go, well, I don’t like that she went home. So

I’m not going to be a jerk next time, right? We don’t have that. We have you

and I are the moms and our kids are playing and Sarah’s mean to Joey. And

then we say, oh, Sarah, those were not nice words that you said to Joey. Joey,

you come here now. You say you’re sorry. And we completely over manage theconflict. Kids never get. just those little disappointments that teach them. So by

the time they’re in their own world where they have to manage conflict when

they’re a little bit older, the conflict’s bigger and more impactful and they

haven’t had practice over time or any confidence that they can do it, which is

why a lot of kids, the minute they face conflict or they try to do something they

don’t know how to do right away, they cannot persist through a productive

struggle. And we’ve created that with that environment, right? So executive

function is built through experiences and practice. And it’s our ability to think

and be adaptable, to read people’s facial expressions. You know, when you

don’t have family dinners, like when I had, when I was a kid, they were boring.

You had to listen to your parents. I mean, they’re boring. Figure out like, how

do I make this interesting? Or how do I, you know, ask a question that might.

bring this conversation back to something I want to talk about, or you start to

learn like I’m yammering on and they’re starting to glaze over. So maybe I need

to stop talking and let somebody else talk for a minute. You know? Yeah. They

don’t learn that. So I think part of the reason that we have so much. quote

unquote, more ADHD is not that we necessarily have more ADHD, but we have

a widespread epidemic of executive function delays. So whether that’s

something that’s nature or nurture,

07:50 : right, you know, but we are, yeah,

07:53 : it doesn’t really matter. At the end of the day, we can treat it

the same way. And I think the other thing with ADHD that’s important is if

you’ve got, you know, true ADHD, it’s not the inability to focus. it people with

adhd can actually focus quite well the problem is that they over focus yeah

08:10 : you

08:10 : know i always use a story so my husband i’m the only one in

my family that doesn’t have add so i have to be very organized so

08:18 : My, you know,

08:20 : the inability to decide what to focus on is a problem. When my

kids were young, they would have a hundred point test and a five point project,

but they were excited about the five point project and they would spend three

days on it and then they would forget to study for the hundred point project. So

just that being able to prioritize attention and what’s in my hut, my son actually

describes his ADHD. He said, I’m nearsighted. he said i can see everything that’sright in front of me but things that are not right in front of me are blurry

08:51 : And that is a great explanation. I like that because it’s true.

08:56 : Yep. And so he ends up where, you know, it’s not that he

didn’t want to be prepared for something or he didn’t want to plan ahead, but

he, he, his brain just doesn’t see it. It’s not in his field of vision. So he’s had to

learn to use, you know, his phone to put tasks in or use, and my husband uses

a.

09:15 : I taught him how to do basically you divide tasks that are

timely and important and tasks that are timely and not important. Tasks that

are not timely but important and tasks that really aren’t all that important or

timely but maybe are just interesting. And then you start to say, okay, if they’re

important and they’re timely, those are the do nows. So when you put your to-

do list together, you want to get those done first. If they’re not timely but

important to you, those are the things you do when you have some free time.

And, you know, those are the things that get you excited to do something. So it

doesn’t feel like work. And then if they’re timely and not important, depending

on like if you can delegate those, have somebody else for you or just get them

over with. And then, you know, kind of teaching them like what reduces your

stress. If you have 40 things on your to do list, are you better to start with

something you really want to do? Because that’s another hallmark of ADHD is

that. Just like if you and I are driving in the car and start to get tired and you

get kind of that heavy feeling, what do we do? We start to fidget. We get out,

we walk around, right? If a person with ADHD is trying to pay attention to

something that does not interest them, then their brain, it’s not the exact same

chemicals, but their brain goes to sleep. And so when we see in classrooms,

kids are fidgeting or, you know, or blurting things out, you know, they’re trying,

they’re trying to stay awake.

10:39 : And I’m glad you brought up classrooms because I know that

for kids with ADHD, boredom is like one of the worst things on the planet for

them to deal with. So what do they do? They’re sitting in class. they maybe they

have a sensory toy maybe they have a wobble chair they’re trying to pay

attention the material makes sense to them because they have higher

intelligence but then they feel that surge of energy going through their body

how do they manage that in a classroom setting without like getting into trouble11:13 : Right. Well, and that’s the problem, I think, is that so many

classrooms are set up for compliance and sit and do what you’re told when

you’re told, really, as opposed to setting them up. And, you know, we expect

even kids with autism or with ADHD, we expect them to restrict themselves so

that they function in our world. But the reality is that the world outside of

school really isn’t that way. It’s a lot more adaptable to you. You create your

own way to work. You want to stand up desk, have a stand up desk. You want

to take a break and do a couple laps. People have to learn how to be

productive. And we don’t give them an opportunity to do that in school. And,

you know, another example that I always use that that is very frustrating. If you

ever came to our house for dinner in the Riegel House, if we’re having a dinner

conversation and one of my kids or my husband has a thought, they put their

hand up and. you stop talking and you let them say what’s in their mind.

Because the other thing is people with ADHD have low working memory. And so

if they have a thought and they’ve made a connection, they want to say it. And

if they don’t say it, they’re going to have to work really hard to hold on to it. So

they’re not going to be listening to you anyways. And they want to say it. So

what they do is blurt things out and then they get in trouble.

12:32 : Yeah. Stop.

12:34 : Don’t talk. Raise your hand. And if teachers understand the

mechanisms of ADD, it can be a hand up and be like, I’m so excited that this is

you’re thinking you’re into what we’re talking about. Right. But we shut them

down. So so I you know, when I work with teachers in classrooms, I talk about a

couple of things. One thing that I do that is. really great. And if you have

parents listening, this is great to do at home when you’ve got homework or

chores or things where it’s hard to sustain because most kids don’t like to clean

their room.

13:06 : Yeah. So what

13:08 : we do is learning sprints. And so you set a timer and you say,

okay, we’re going to do an eight minute learning sprint, a 10 minute learning

sprint, whatever it is. And you put the expectations.

13:19 : So during this next 10 minutes, you’re going to read this book.

You’re going to be, you know, it’s independent work. So no talking, you’re going

to focus on this and you’re going to answer these questions. And so it givesthem very clear instructions of what they’re going to do. You put a timer on the

board, or if you’re at home, use a timer. And that way, as I’m going through, if I

start to find that I’m really starting to shift my focus, I can look up and be like,

oh, I only have a minute and a half left. I can do this. And then focus back

down. Then after when the timer goes off, no matter where you are. So if I’m a

teacher and I’m in the middle of something and the timer goes off, I stop and

say, oh, pick it up in a minute. Let’s take a brain break. And you can do two

minutes, three minutes.

13:58 : It could be stand up, stretch. It could be vagal nerve exercises.

It could be, you know, any number of things. Like with my son, when we used

to do homework. we’d set the timer and I’d say, give me five minutes of focus.

And then I’ll give you five minutes of running around the house. And he

wouldn’t know. And it teaches the kids. So again, that executive function delay,

even if you have kids without ADHD, it teaches them how long is five minutes or

10 minutes or 12 minutes or whatever it is. What can I accomplish when I focus

for that long, which is going to reduce their stress when they have to

accomplish things. And then it also teaches them. There’s a time to focus and

then I get a time to break and a time to focus. And so it teaches them to shift

their focus because that’s something else that’s a hallmark of ADHD is that they

get over focused. And when you try to say, hey, it’s time to switch and go to do

something else, they get angry or they get agitated because they’re not ready

and they’re overly focused, which can be a real gift. I mean, my husband’s an

artist, so he goes. He gets totally over focused and it makes him a better

15:03 : artist. Right. Like forgets to eat and everything. Right.

15:08 : Yeah. I was like, put the timer on because you’ve got to pick

the kids up. You can’t lose time. Right.

15:14 : There’s a lot of

15:15 : misunderstandings about ADHD and and. the one that is so

upsetting is that they can’t focus when they’re not interested and it’s it’s so

frustrating because like just like the driving in the car getting tired thing the

minute you get home you have fantasized about your bed for like the whole car

ride home and you get home and you’re wide awake

15:34 : And

15:35 : it’s the same thing for them. They can’t stay focused in class.They’re fuzzy. They’re tired. They’re fidgety. And yet the minute class is over and

they’re up moving around talking to people, they’re fine. And so it’s a super

frustrating thing. And we think of it as like, well, they just are a bad kid or

they’re not paying attention or they’re choosing to do this. And the reality is

they’re not choosing to do this. And if we. make adjustments with the idea of

the goal of this classroom is not to teach a kid to sit and listen and do what

they’re told. The goal of the classroom is to teach them skills and content. And

so however they need to do that, you set up your class with the learning

sprints, you’re going to find that kids with and without ADHD do much better. I

did it at a, it was a high school level program, but it was for incarcerated youth.

So you want to talk about a lot of ADHD and trauma related.

16:27 : they increased their uh productivity it was a computer-based

class by 30 percent by doing yeah

16:34 : that’s amazing when i also think that it expresses itself

differently in girls versus boys oh yeah the girls they are going to be compliant

and be as perfectly behaved as possible typically in the classroom setting. So

getting them diagnosed is a lot harder. Whereas the boys, typically they are

going to move and talk out and different things like that. And so, you know, for

those girls, what are you seeing differently between girls and boys in terms of

how it expresses itself?

17:10 : Yeah. Well, I think one of the things is that people don’t think

about is there’s a lot of mental health that comes along with ADHD and there

are social issues and friendship issues. And so what I found, like even in my

daughter, cause my daughter was, you know, that like, I was like, she doesn’t

have ADHD. And the funniest thing was my son, when he was in like first grade,

he came up to me, he said, Hey mom, I got what, what sis has I need. And I

was like,

17:38 : what i got it too it’s contagious

17:41 : talking about and then i was like oh yeah i guess you do so

anyways um but for paige what was very different was making relationships

was difficult for her because she would meet somebody and she was all in so it

was like i’ve known you for five minutes and you’re my best friend yeah you

know, and she would throw herself into things and she, and she still does this

today. She’s 24 and she’s still like, she loves to make gifts for people. And she,you know, she’s a very loving, thoughtful person, but like understanding the

rhythm of the development of a relationship for kids with ADHD because they’re

impulsive.

18:21 : Yeah. And they want, they’re all in. It’s like, everything is big

and fast and loud and. Yep. that can be a really beautiful thing like you’re

saying with your daughter that she’s making all these gifts for people and it can

be a beautiful thing it just it breaks my heart kids in schools school age is such

a hard time to have this and i we understand that teachers they’re doing their

best too to manage a whole group of kids

18:51 : all with their own different needs, right? I do believe all kids

are special needs in different ways, right? They have things that they need. So I

feel like… You know, teachers are doing their best. I know parents are doing

their best, but don’t know what to do because a lot of times their kid comes

home and has all these outbursts and energy and anger or whatever it is

because they’ve been bottling it up all day. Well,

19:16 : that was my daughter. She was perfect at school, good

student, everything else. And then she would come home and either be full of

anxiety or when she was little, it was just like anger, rage, you know. And it was

like she had held it in all day. My son was the opposite. He was the wanderer.

He was the one that like asked to go to the bathroom and didn’t come back for

45 minutes.

19:36 : Did he ever leave the building or did he stay in the building?

No,

19:39 : no, he wasn’t. Yeah, he stayed in the building.

19:42 : I heard a kid just leaving like, I’m

19:44 : going to go home. Yeah, he just, he, you know, he was

looking for a safe space. and so and you know it’s interesting um i did a huge

statistical study with a large suburban district in the columbus area and um we

took all the data that we could get our hands on and our research question was

what are the factors that impact grade point average and we looked at

everything we looked at prior teacher quality we looked at attendance we

looked at extracurriculars we looked at all of the data we could find do you

know what the number one indicator was

20:16 : Hmm. Yes. For their grades?20:19 : Yeah, for grade point average. Quality of sleep? Nope. Nurse

visits. If they went to the nurse twice, it had zero impact. If they went a third

time, it was the single most impactful variable out of all of them.

20:38 : What were some of the other variables you considered?

20:41 : We looked at whether they were in an extracurricular activity.

We looked at prior GPA. We looked at… testing, you know, test scores. We

looked at teacher value added data. We looked at attendance. We looked at

whether or not they had an IEP or a 504. We looked at race. We looked at free

and reduced lunch. I mean, we took every single data. And the second most

impactful was a 504 plan. And so the team had a really good discussion. Then

we said, okay, so. What we’re seeing here is that kids are, kids want to go, they

want somewhere safe and the classroom is not safe for them. The nurse’s office

is safe and it’s the first step to get home and leave.

21:30 : You

21:31 : know, so the nurse visits were an indicator and we controlled

for like people who go for diabetes or whatever.

21:37 : But, you know, it was a really interesting conversation because

I said, then the fact that, I mean, and it was like twice the effect size of any

other variable. And then the 504 plan came in second. And I said, okay, so

you’ve got kids going to the nurse because they don’t feel psychological safety

or emotional safety. They, you know, they just don’t want to be here. I said, and

then secondly, who’s put on 504 plans? People with anxiety or mental health

problems or people with ADHD. And so then they’re allowed to advocate for

accommodations for themselves, but they get no support. So we had some

really interesting conversations about how do we change these numbers?

Because there is a segment of students that are way underperforming their

abilities due to other factors.

22:25 : And it’s factors that can be adjusted if people are willing to

advocate for kids. yeah like that’s the important thing it’s like fixable and these

are factors that it’s impacting their well-being yes

22:41 : that was yeah that was my part with my son because he he

had a couple really wonderful teachers and he excelled in those years and then

in fifth grade he had i i mean they were just psychologically abusing him. It was

awful. And we had a couple of meetings and I finally said to my husband, I’mlike, if he came home with bruises, we would pull him. And I said, he is coming

home with long-term. damage to his psyche. I’m like, we got it. So I pulled him

out and homeschooled him, um, rest of fifth grade. And then he, I asked him

cause I had a blast homeschooling him, but he didn’t, he was wanted to go to

middle school with his buddies. And I was like, that’s fine. And then we had a

wonderful intervention specialist and the teachers there. And it was a

completely different experience.

23:26 : Can you share just a few, like three. specific examples of

psychological abuse, because I’m already thinking of the parents are like, Oh

yeah, my kid too. And they don’t understand. And they’re being terrible. Like,

that’s not what you’re, you are a thoughtful person who wasn’t just flying off

the cuff to protect your baby. You knew that this was problematic. So what are

like a few examples?

23:52 : So he, um, so he had in his, ETR and his valuation, he had, uh,

he had something called failure to maintain set, which means it’s a, it’s a

working memory issue. And what it means is that I can do a task multiple times

and then all of a sudden forget how to do it. And that’s that procedural memory.

24:17 : Yeah. And, and he’s got like 130. Yeah, exactly. And it was

math and he has like 130 IQ. So he’s a super smart kid. He knows he’s smart.

He knows he’s capable. So he would be in math class and he would just forget

and she wouldn’t help him. And it was like, this is a physical problem that he’s

trying to deal with, but she wouldn’t help him.

24:41 : She would just needle at him. Why aren’t you working? Why

aren’t you working? And what he would end up doing is he would end up

having like a panic attack attack for sure. But it was an internal panic attack. So

when he would, he would crawl inside himself and like dissociate. So he would

just stare off into space and he wouldn’t respond when she would talk to him,

start hammering him about stuff. And then she’d yell at him and kick him out of

the classroom for insubordination. And then if he got super stressed, he might

talk back a little bit because he’d be like, I can’t do this or whatever. He was

angry. And instead of recognizing this was a stress related behavior, she would

say he was being rude and she would send him out and give him a detention.

And so she was doing nothing to help alleviate the problem. She took a

problem that was a intellectual. biological issue and she turned it into acharacter and behavior problem. And then she put him in, you know, special

seating and she was constantly needling at him. And he eventually, so I got a

phone call one day that, um, he’d had a seizure in math class, went and picked

him up and we took him down to the ER. He had a stress induced myoclonic

seizure in that environment. And, um,

25:51 : and it was unacceptable. That’s unacceptable.

25:54 : yeah and then the other thing too is they would call me and

be like yeah he left the classroom because he would want to get safe he wanted

to go somewhere where he could breathe because he was and um so you know

they’d call and be like yeah he left the classroom again and i’m like okay what

do you want me to do? Like, I’m not there. Like you, you guys have how many

kids you’ve done? Like you’re telling me that you don’t have any kind of

interventions or any kind of, and then like, even when I went in for the IEP

meeting, I said, okay, he’s a twice exceptional kid. So high IQ, ADHD impacting

his ability to perform. What are, what are interventions you’ve done for twice

exceptional kids? Crickets. No idea. And I said, well, and they hated me because

I was working at the time for the department of education. And so, and I said,

and they kept saying, well, what do you want? What do you want? And I said, I

want to be a parent. I want to be in here as a parent. And I want you to be the

professional to tell me what you’re going to do to help my kid and how I can

support you. That’s what I want. And I said, you know, so there is a twice

exceptional office at the department of education.

27:00 : Yeah. Go learn. Go learn about it.

27:03 : I had happened to be there the day before and I picked up

the manual from them and had a conversation. And so I brought it back and

said, like, hey, here’s the manual. And I went through and marked all the things

that I think make sense with my son. Yeah. Never seen it before. So it was just

educational malpractice. And I was like, they’re taking a kid who is so smart and

loves to learn and they’re beating him to death. And he’s now seeing himself as

a failure and a bad kid, and he’s having seizures over the stress of it. I was like,

I’m done. I would totally

27:36 : be done. That would be the straw right there.

27:38 : But you know what? It’s not just my son. 30% of students with

ADHD drop out of school.27:45 : 30%. That is ridiculous, especially because a lot of them are

intelligent. you know i believe that we’re all intelligent in different ways and if

you can foster that and develop it yeah that’s what we want right so what

28:03 : can

28:04 : parents do i want to backtrack a little bit like when the kids

come home from school and they are just kind of out of control yep Right. And

I could see some parents wanting to be like, oh, you don’t talk to me that way.

You needed it. And you just come in and are yelling. And I can see some

parents reacting explosively. Yep. I could also see some parents just being very

passive and just kind of hiding from it. What do you recommend parents do to

help their children start regulating when they get home?

28:37 : Yeah. One thing I would say is that the transition from school

to home. takes a minute and for some kids it takes longer than a minute so like

figuring out what your child needs sometimes they need to go in their room

and just be left alone or they need to escape for a little bit so they can come

home and play some video games rest you know go into their room draw

whatever sometimes they need to go run around wild and you know get the

energy out kind of thing it just depends on your kid But I think the first thing I

would say is mind the transition, because if you start needling them, you’re

you’re fighting with a brain that is not ready for the next thing. Right. The other

thing I would say is positivity, positivity, positivity. They already feel bad about

themselves. They already know that they don’t fit in the expectations eight

hours a day. The last thing they need is to come home. and feel like a failure at

home and so putting routines in place like when they come home tell me one

good thing that happened today what’s one you know thing you’re looking

forward to tonight you know what what’s one way that you’re really proud of

yourself you know giving them a chance and and from a biology standpoint that

primes your thalamus which is sort of your data manager of your brain it

primes that thalamus to look for positive things in the environment

30:04 : So I think that’s one piece. And then I think the other piece is,

you know, doing those learning sprints, little chunks, and then celebrating each

time. Like, so, you know, teaching them some of that meta analysis. So like you

do a little learning sprint and you say, look at this, you focused for five minutes

and look how many you got done. So do you think maybe you could do sixminutes on the next one? Or do you like five minutes? And if they like five

minutes, keep it at five minutes. right and then you know but like giving them

some autonomy and power and giving them some some conversation about

like helping them to understand their brain and so like i in the last podcast we

talked about um the way the brain manages stress. Yes. And so just a quick

recap of it, you’ve got different departments in your brain and 80% of the traffic

in our brain is unconscious. So we think there’s a lot of thinking going on that

we are not directing. It’s automatic. And so there’s two, I’ve named them,

there’s Harold and Bob. Harold is my data manager. He’s responsible for taking

in the environment, running it through some filters on you know what what’s

actually going on and turning a reality into a perception of reality he writes up a

report he sends it to bob and bob’s the amygdala he’s our security monitor he

decides whether to hit the panic button whether to tap it or wail on it or

whether we’re stressed those two When a kid is out of control, it’s because Bob

and Harold have hijacked the brain. Because basically, if Bob hits that panic

button really hard, he sends a message directly to the CEO of the brain where

our executive functions live, where who we are, our morals, our character, our

personality. He sends a message up there and says, hey, we’re in danger. So go

down the street and get a Coke. We’ll call you when. when you’re safe again.

And now Harold and Bob are in charge. And so when you have a child coming

home who is very overloaded, stressed out, giving them, first of all, some time

to transition their way down. And then second of all, maybe saying, hey, why is

Harold, you know, what is Harold telling you right now? Is Harold telling you

that something’s not safe here? Or, you know, why is Bob so jumpy today? How

can I help you calm Bob down? Because nobody likes to feel that way. And yet,

if I say to you, Tasha, what’s wrong with you? That is an inflammatory

statement, right?

32:31 : Yeah, I’m going to be defensive.

32:33 : 100%. Right off the cuff. Especially after all day long, I’ve been

the wrong, right? So instead, if I teach the kids about their brain compartments,

and then I can say, hey, Tasha, Harold seems like he’s sending you a lot of

negative

32:47 : stuff. What’s he talking about right now?

32:49 : And now all of a sudden I’m your ally and not your adversary.And I think also when parents understand the biology of stress, it’s not about

you. So there’s no point in getting in an argument about it. You are witnessing

a brain that for whatever reason has associated what’s happening in the

environment right now with negative. emotion or negative, you know, stress

reaction. And so that association, and sometimes those associations are faulty.

Yeah. Well, there, so it, it has, you know, may have nothing to do with what’s

happening right now.

33:25 : When I think we’ve all had maybe a bad day, right. Where it’s

like, it’s really not the people around us. It’s something internal, or we’ve all felt

very overwhelmed, overstimulated, like life was too much. And we might have.

been snippy or something like that and for some reason adults set expectations

for kids that are unreasonable uh -huh right on top of this is

33:53 : a

33:53 : brain development challenge it’s not them being disrespectful

it’s trying to teach them and guide them. That’s kind of what I’m gathering from

you. Well, and I think the

34:05 : other thing is our expectations for their behavior require

executive function, right? And so we know they don’t have it and we expect

them to have it and use it. And when they don’t, they get in trouble.

34:17 : So you would never expect somebody who doesn’t have a

right arm to open the door with their right arm. Yes. Exist. Yes. You would allow

them to open it with their left arm. You might even actually open the door for

them. Right. So it’s the same thing. Like there’s just parts, there’s nothing

wrong with them. Right. It just functions differently.

34:39 : Yeah. Well, and the joy with neuroplasticity is that you can

build it. So you can’t grow another arm, but boy, you can grow your brain, but

we don’t, we don’t do. And this is my life’s work is like tier one instruction, basic

instruction for all students. should be intentional about building executive

functioning and giving kids a chance to have some meta-analysis of their

thinking, to learn how to learn, to learn how to think. And we talk about that all

the time and we give it a lot of lip service, but we don’t have a strategic process

for doing it or measuring whether or not it’s working. And so we end up where

we just have kids with ADHD that end up with an intervention specialist. who

becomes an overpaid mom or dad and and you know so i’m always talkingabout the under utilization of special ed teachers like you’ve got a lot of

expertise there that they could be filling that gap but when we when we set this

up where all kids have to fill out the same worksheet and all kids have and now

you’ve got a kid who it’s taking them longer they’re getting behind and they’re

behind behind behind now you have no time to actually fill the gap that’s

causing that delay you know

35:53 : and don’t get me started on the kids who are high ability and

then they’re just given more work they get that worksheet and then they get

more worksheets right

36:01 : right

36:01 : i mean that’s a whole nother conversation for

36:03 : another day yeah yeah no my son was he was selected for

gifted something or other and he came home and said yeah i don’t want to do

that and i said why and he’s like because it’s just more he’s like He said they

pull the kids out and they take them somewhere else and they make them do a

bunch of stuff. And then when they come back, they have to make up all the

work. It’s like being

36:21 : absent every day. And I was like, it’s not more challenging. It’s

more work. Yes. Yes. Who wants to sign up for that?

36:30 : Right. You know, and I feel like special education interventions

are good for everybody. Yeah. Gifted education approaches are good for

everybody.

36:40 : They really are. We should be teaching

36:42 : classes as if we’re teaching an entire group of gifted children.

And we should be putting the supports in place that we would put for every

special ed student in there. And if we did that and stop teaching to what we

consider typical. Yeah. We’d have so much more growth and engagement.

36:59 : I completely agree with you. And I also know that is no small

feat. i mean teachers don’t have time as it is and so what i’m hoping from this

conversation is that parents feel empowered to be more patient and

understanding and also advocate for their kids and that teachers also feel like

they could make some slight adjustments to improve but there’s only 24 hours

in a day and i think the more that everybody works together for the kid right

it’s not about grown-up egos37:33 : Right. It’s about the betterment of each child. And that’s really

what I think your work is, is about advocacy for the kids and supporting the kids.

37:42 : Yeah. And the reality too, like the learning sprint, that is most

impactful from a behavior standpoint and from an acceleration of academics. It

has been the most powerful strategy that I have ever had people use.

37:57 : And it’s so doable. I’m

38:00 : not asking new curriculum. I’m not asking. All you are doing is

literally setting a timer and doing a brain break.

38:08 : That’s it.

38:09 : And you’re building that pattern of how we learn. And guess

what? Go to any adult professional development day and they can’t focus for

eight hours either. You know, when I do professional development, you need to

build in turn and talk time so that people can process what they’re learning.

People can’t handle a 45 minute lecture. And yet we expect to your point about

we expect things out of kids that we can’t do. And so what do teachers do?

They go on Facebook, they grade, they don’t listen to you. They don’t respond.

They don’t, you know, and it’s all the things that they would be furious at the

students for doing.

38:46 : So what I really try, so I call it being neuro well, like basically

having a culture and practices that are aligned with the brain. You know, it’s not

an initiative. It’s not a curriculum. It’s literally a pair of glasses. And when you

put a pair of glasses, they’re informed by our brain, brain science, knowledge of

ADHD, knowledge of executive function. Then all of a sudden you start to look

at your practices differently and you start to say, huh? that’s why this works or

that’s why this doesn’t work. And so it’s not a matter of one more thing. And I,

and I know teachers are very overloaded, but the problem is they’re feeling

overloaded. They’re exhausted and they’re stressed because what we’re doing

isn’t working. I

39:28 : was just going to say, it’s not

39:30 : effective. Right.

39:33 : And so what you do is you help teachers be more effective,

right? So how can people get in touch with you? I know, of course, I’ll share it in

all the show notes again. Please let people know how they can get connected to

you.39:45 : Yeah, so they, so I have, you can go to lisaRiegel.com and book

time to meet with me, talk about what you want to do. I do keynote addresses.

I do workshops. I do. I do book studies, so I even do virtual book studies for

like CEU credit. And then I take about four or five districts that are truly ready.

to transform and I’ll go deep dive with them for a year or two to really help

them through the whole systemic change and support the teachers along the

way so that the change sticks and doesn’t feel like that was the, you know,

event of yesteryear.

40:22 : Next new thing. Yeah. Next new thing. So the next new thing,

this is effective and doable. Yeah. Yeah. So lisaRiegel

40:29 : .com or they I’m on LinkedIn so they can connect with me on

LinkedIn and then we can set up a time to have a conversation. and see if I can

help. And then, you know, I would really encourage teachers to, to read neuro.

Well, I think they’ll find that there’s a lot, you know, I’ve done training for so

many years, but this stuff around the brain science. And when I train on neuro,

well, it’s like teachers, like the computer shuts and they lean in and they look at

me and they listen. And they’re like, this is stuff that I never knew. And it’s like,

yeah, now that you know it, it’s so easy. to make these shifts it’s just that right

now we’re throwing darts in the dark and hoping we hit something so it i think

teachers walk out of those trainings feeling hopeful and feeling empowered

with new knowledge that they can make these tweaks in their classroom and

then they start to make them and they start to see the kids responding and it’s

like the greatest emotional release ever because it’s they care about the kids

41:28 : they really do like i want parents to know like teachers are not

in it for the money no No, we really do care about the kids. Yeah. So that’s

great that you help them get back to the heart of why they started teaching in

the first place.

41:42 : Well, and the other thing, the last section of neuro, well, the

first section talks about all these contextual factors that are impacting students

thinking. The second goes into the brain science. The third is really for teachers,

but there’s stuff that parents can pick up. And the section of the book is all for

parents. It’s how to influence positivity in the home and to create that positive

context in your home. So, yeah, they would find it interesting and probably lots

of actionable things they can do at home.42:09 : No, I think that’s great. I love learning from teachers because

teachers know how to keep it simple and explain everything well. So I hope that

people get your book. And thank you again for being here. I really appreciated

learning from you. for a second time.

42:25 : Thank you. Thank you so much for having me.

42:35 : Thank you for tuning into this episode of Diary of a Dreamer. I

hope you found the stories and tips shared today to be a source of motivation

and strength. Remember, every challenge you face is a chance to grow and

move closer to your dreams. Don’t forget to subscribe, leave a review, and

share this podcast with anyone who could use a boost of encouragement.

Please check out my website, TashaEizinger.com.